Chihiro's feelings
by LovingRainbow
Summary: She was jealous of all those girls who got to be a little bit close to him. She hated the thought of him being someone else's. She hated the thought of imagining him on a date with some other girl. She hated the thought of him. She hated...herself for ever loving...him. But she couldn't, because, she loved him.


This fanfic is completely a part of my life. I mean that I was rejected almost just like Chihiro. She was rejected by Keima, and I was...well, I have no intention to talk about it. I am surprised that my life story became just like Chihiro's. To tell you the truth, I hated her, but after seeing her heartbreaking rejection, I was...well you know, almost crying like mad. The heartbreaking rejection in my life came some last month, and I can still remember almost all the words he said me. You know, this will be something I have experienced, so happy reading. You are now going to read about me. Read, and review.

* * *

"Then, if you didn't love me, why did you agree to come on a date with me?"

"I am just fooling around with a real woman. The thing is, I hate you. Baka."

* * *

Chihiro woke up to the nightmare that she had been dreaming consecutively for three days, and her eyes turned wide at the remembrance of the dream.

Keima...

A single tear dropped down her cheeks, as she remembered all the cruel words he had used on her. Just to make her go away from him, just to make her hate him, he broke her heart. Another tear fell down her cheeks.

Keima...

Chihiro had been trying to sleep for at least ten minutes, all the exhaustion of the festival had taken its toll on her, almost made her fall into a fever, but that horrible dream had kept her...awake.

She had taken leaves from the school, because of two reasons. She had no intention to meet Ayumi, and no intention to meet Keima.

Looking out at the window and then at her alarm clock, she saw it was 6pm. Yes, it was an odd time to sleep, but the exhaustive nights made her fall asleep now and then, so, it was no big deal if she was resting. But, that dream prevented her to sleep peacefully.

Another tear, and her head started hurting.

No, no why are you crying? Because of that heartless beast, who broke your heart? She asked herself, and then got the answer.

No, you are crying because THAT heartless beast broke your heart.

She checked her temperature again. It was quite high, and she felt dizzy. Lying on her bed, she could hear the pitter patter of the rain. It was autumnal rain. She hated it.

She hated him, and she hated herself for falling in love with him, but she hated herself most because she confessed her love to him, only to get...rejected.

She couldn't help herself, she had to. It was hurting her because she was unable to keep it. She confessed to him, and now look at the consequences.

She had attended some classes after the festival, maybe two days, and he averted his gaze whenever she looked at him.

Why? Her heart asked.

Because he wants to make it prominent that he hates you. Her heart answered.

She smiled, as another tear fell down. Her eyes must be looking bloodshot.

"I was fooling around with a real woman." Was what he had said at the terrace to her.

Her lips parted, as she lied on her bed, reminiscing. Her eyes were closed, but her tears still fell.

Real woman.

He was doing nothing but playing around with her, with her because he didn't love her? Because he hated her?

Her smile became more prominent, her tears fell endlessly. She knew now, how it felt when a person, whom you love, not only 'does'nt' love you back, but also hates you. Her heart felt heavy, her eyes felt dizzy.

She remembered, she was crying during the concert. She hated herself for being so weak. She was so...worthless. So useless.

Why did she confess? Because she had a faint hope that her feelings will be rewarded? Oh, wasn't she such a fool? She dreamt continuously about her lover, having hopes about the fact that she will be accepted, but she was wrong.

The rain became heavier as the time was passing. It seemed as if her heart and the nature were completely in sync.

She sighed. She didn't realize about it when that jerk, that asshole got her heart, and now that she was rejected, it pained like...hell.

She was jealous of all those girls who got to be a little bit close to him.

She hated the thought of him being someone else's.

She hated the thought of imagining him on a date with some other girl.

She hated the thought of him.

She hated...herself for ever loving...him.

But lastly, she murmured while the endless rain swept away all her sorrows, "Unfortunately, I gave my heart to you, Katsuragi kun, and I don't know the way of getting it back. I...I love you. More than anyone else in this whole...wide world. And I hate myself for that, but I can't help it...because, I love you." She said, as a tear rolled down her cheek.


End file.
